fillers: A Poem

 I just feel like
 I must fill the pauses in my speech 
 with filler phrases
 for fear of losing a hand 
 in the conversation

gossip: A Poem

 there is a power in my silence
 you’ll never understand

being: A Poem

 my mind
 is my being
 when I lose it
 I lose myself

melt: A Poem

 melt me
 in your mouth
 bitter
 and 
 sweet
 and feel your problems
 sink away

sweet: A Poem

 I ate the fruit just because it was forbidden 
 my spine is steel
 my tears are oceans
 my mouth is outer space 
 swallow me to feel big
 cut me open and watch
 as my blood and water pours out for you
 my brain is god’s gift to my mad self

lost self: A Poem

 when the pills stopped working
 it’s like I started grieving my lost self

mothers and sisters: A Poem

  I find myself constantly searching
 for mothers and sisters in the women around me
 and being let down all over again
 when the wires don’t connect
 it’s hard
 being disappointed by family

dirt: A Poem

 my plant’s pot is overflowing
 it didn’t need anything
 but I wanted to give it something

gag: A Poem

 I don’t want to feel brave just for living
 gag me instead
 please

checking in: A Poem

 when he checks on me
 with a smile
 and a wink
 I don’t know what he’s thinking
 but I know it’s about me